The Dangers of "just"

I hear it all the time. I'm just... (fill in the blank). I'm just a teenager. I'm just a stay at home mom. I'm just a wife. I'm just a lay person. I'm just an associate. I'm just retired. I'm just a working mom. I'm just the teacher. I'm just a... The list could go on and on...

 Not to long ago I was talking to a friend who was feeling pretty low. As we spoke she shared that she feels inadequate at times. She looked me in the eye and said "I'm just a stay at home mom." My heart sank as I tried to share how envious I was of the role she has as a stay at home mom, since my heart ached for a baby. I forgot about the conversation untill recently. 

 This post isn't about wanting what others have or working vs stay at home moms. It's about the dangerous word we so often use in our everyday conversations. The little word: just. We use it without even thinking about it. 

Listen up friends...You are not just anything.  As you have read my blog you have seen a glimpse into the darkness of OCD and how the Lord has brought me into the light. Lately i havent been able to get these words out my of my head. "But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light." (1peter  2:9)  

That promise shows me we are not just anything! God has chosen you. He has chosen me and loves me and has a purpose for my life. I especially like the way The Message says it "But you are the ones chosen by God, chosen for the high calling of priestly work, chosen to be a holy people, God’s instruments to do his work and speak out for him, to tell others of the night-and-day difference he made for you—from nothing to something, from rejected to accepted."

I'm so grateful that God has made a "night-and-day" difference in my life and I can no longer be just anything. 

I'm living fully present in the moment today!

Dear 18 Year Old Me

Dear 18 Year Old Me,

There are so many things I wish I could tell you. So many things you need to know, things I wish you realized. 

18 year old Me, you have no idea what the world holds for you and all that is ahead. The worries you have pale in comparison to what the Lord has planned for your life.

That boy you like, the one who you think is so good for you, he is nothing compared to the man God has planned for you to marry. Be patient even when you have dates in your dorm with Ben and Jerry (ice cream). Your husband is funny, smart, and has a heart for ministry that matches your hearts desire so well. He is worth the wait.

That dream wedding is nothing to the actual wedding you will have. All the primping you do now for boys won't really matter to the man who will one day find you to be the most beautiful woman alive, even in a t shirt jeans and no makeup. Your future husband, he loves you for who you are, not for what you look like. I wish you knew that...it would save your heart from disappointment because the boys you like now are not worth the trouble.

Dear 18 year old me, the loneliness you feel at times, well I can't say it will end, but you will learn how to face it. You won't spend hours in the gym, trying to make your body look good enough. It won't be fixed with surrounding yourself with people and even changing who you are to fit in. You see the loneliness you feel will only be fixed with having a longing for The Lord and seeking Him daily. It just can't be fixed with people, food, shopping, guys or anything but The Lord.

That homecoming queen that you are so jealous of, she will become one of your best friends. She will pray for you, accept you, encourage you and your kids will be best buddies. Stop judging people who are prettier than you. You are beautiful in your own way.

18 year old me, cherish the days of late night pizza runs, girl talks in the dorm room, attending a christian university and eating in the cafe with friends. There will be a day that you sit with your toddler and eat lunch while you wait for the babysitter to come so you can go to work. Life isn't better or worse now, it's just different. Enjoy this carefree time in your life.

Cherish the time with your family, there will be a day when seeing them will be quick. But don't worry technology will evolve and you will FaceTime them.

18 year old me, always do your best, be honest, love the unloveable, never give up, pray without ceasing, trust the one who created you and serve Him.

Most of all live fully present in the moment.  

Love,

Ashley